ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
