she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
