I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
