My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
too bad you live with your parents still
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
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