I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I know her cup size but not her name....
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
