I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
