That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
How's work?
Spinning.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
