Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
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