More tranny stories later!
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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