Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
i was born a porn star she said
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
