the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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