i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Your cock deserves a montage
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
