That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
