there's paper in my vomit.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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