you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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