god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I need to align my fucking chakras
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
