i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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