this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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