We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
