I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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