fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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