I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
