I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
