Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize