Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
