Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
