pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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