I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
