Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
