Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
