My sheets look like a crime scene.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
