I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize