I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
