He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
