After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
