She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize