What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
