It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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