he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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