i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
