Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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