I accidentally burped into my bong.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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