She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
