i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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