I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Randomize
