So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
