so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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