Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize