when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize