Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
