I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
