your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
